The Duchess of Cambridge Kate Middleton has unveiled her garden at the Chelsea Flower Show, which was inspired in part by the Royal Family’s home planet.
Alongside her husband William, the Duke of Cambridge, Kate was pictured showing their young children around the garden, which encompasses a number of features that are found in our lizard overlords natural habitat.
“I’m so grateful to have been given the chance to create something that our children can really enjoy,” Kate told reporters.
“The hatchlings are too young to survive the journey through spacetime at the moment, so I wanted to create a little slice of home here on earth.
“You can see there are some nice big logs for them to climb up, a stream of lovely fresh water and a gorgeous smooth rock beneath a giant UV lamp for them to get their body temperature up.
“It’s lovely to see them interacting with their natural surroundings like they did and perhaps when everybody has gone home they’ll be able to peel off their human skin and enjoy it properly.”
Critics have been quick to point out that the garden falls someway short of being environmentally friendly.
“While this is a great PR stunt for their lizard planet, it’s not done ours any good at all,” activist Barry Glover said.
“The huge lamp requires an enormous amount of power and then there’s the pollution created in the construction and transport of the bespoke shedding station – it’s an environmental nightmare.
“And frankly, while it might be helping the planet in many ways, the feeding pit full of human babies is morally dubious.”