Sunday, October 20, 2019
Home Tags Conservatives

Tag: conservatives

‘This is part of my plan you fools’, says Cummings as...

Genius political strategist Dominic Cummings has revealed that trapping his penis in the fly of his trousers is simply the next phase of his master plan to leave the EU with no deal.

John Bercow quits to set up premium rate fetish hotline

Speaker of the House of Commons John Bercow announced he would be stepping down yesterday to focus his energy on a new venture – Bercstation.

Sajid Javid declares end of austerity with a straight face

Chancellor Sajid Javid has declared the government has "turned the page on austerity" and managed to get through his speech without pissing himself with laughter.

‘Do whatever you want, I’m on holiday,’ Queen tells government

The Queen has approved Boris Johnson’s request to prorogue parliament, admitting she simply cannot be arsed to think about any of this while she’s on holiday.

Helpless Dominic Cummings mere spectator as malevolent forehead seizes full control

Dominic Cummings’ evil forehead has grown so powerful that it has now taken control of his entire body, according to sources.

Crumbling Whaley Bridge dam dismissed as project fear

The government has dismissed reports that a Derbyshire dam, which is visibly breaking apart due to flooding, is any risk to the public whatsoever.

Labour claims moral victory in Brecon by-election

Despite seeing their share of the vote drop by 12.4% in the Brecon by-election, with the Liberal Democrats securing overall victory, The Labour Party has claimed the all-important moral victory.

Relief as ‘posh wanker’ not on Jacob Rees-Mogg’s list of banned...

After Jacob Rees-Mogg issued a style guide, banning the use of certain words and phrases, his staff have expressed relief that their favourite phrases are not featured on the list.

10 Downing Street toilet already clogged

In his first move as Prime Minister, Boris Johnson has blocked the toilet at 10 Downing Street, according to reports.

Theresa May fails to negotiate return of tenancy deposit

In her final act as Prime Minister of Great Britain, Theresa May has failed to recoup the tenancy deposit for her time at 10 Downing Street.
60FansLike
49FollowersFollow
25FollowersFollow

MOST READ