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Deputy PM Raab gets to work after being given fake ‘UK...

Acting Prime Minister Dominic Raab says he is getting down to the serious job of running the country by diligently pressing buttons on what he believes are the controls to the United Kingdom.

Dangerous madman Corbyn unwilling to initiate nuclear holocaust

Crazed lunatic Jeremy Corbyn has once again demonstrated why he is a threat to national security, by refusing to commit to incinerating millions of civilians in a nuclear fireball.

Public discourse aided by intervention from Tony Blair

Former Prime Minister Tony Blair has intervened in the heated Brexit debate, making a really helpful speech that has totally calmed everyone down.

Stricken swimmer tells circling sharks that limbs are ‘off the table’

A British holidaymaker, who has gotten into difficulties out at sea, has initiated negotiations to strike a deal with the local great white sharks.

Concern as GCSE results suggest Britain is raising a generation of...

GCSE pass-rates have increased this year despite concerns about the difficulty of exams, prompting parents to ask whether exams are getting easier or are their children just major dorks?

UK ‘first in line’ for vigorous and unrelenting bumming, US confirms

The UK is "first in line" to get bent over and fucked into oblivion by the US, President Trump's national security adviser has said.

Men of Britain unveil disgusting feet

Men across the country are taking advantage of the ongoing heatwave to present their horrendous feet to the public.

Whole of Europe does wanker sign behind Brexit Party MEPs

As they turned their backs during a performance of the EU's 'Ode to Joy' anthem in European Parliament, the rest of Europe took the opportunity to make rude signs at Brexit Party MEPs.

Vladimir Putin denies curling out huge turd on Theresa May’s desk...

Russian president Vladimir Putin has denied accusations that he deposited a steaming log on Theresa May’s desk during the G20 summit in Osaka.

Michael Gove believes he was sold real cocaine

Conservative leadership contender Michael Gove believes the substance he took at social events was actually real drugs, according to reports.
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